The Ten Commandments of Dating (Part 1)

Some of us is dating now, thinking about dating or just done with the whole dating thing... I want to share what I learned last wednesday at church. As a singles group, I hope that this will be beneficial for all of us to learn how we are as a Christian should date. No doubt that the Christian view of dating is different that the world view of dating. Don't let the world teach you theology.

Relationship and dating, they all start with YOU. No one else can make you happy, whole or complete. You must be solid and complete all by yourself.
Do you know who you are?
Do you feel good about yourself?
Do you have a solid sense of worth and value?
REMEMBER – It all starts with you!

Dating Commandment I:
Thou shalt get a life!
Pursue your life now, don’t put it off to the future.
Pursue your dream and goal in life now. Some people put their life on hold until they found the one. If I met someone then…If I got married, then…If I owned a house, then…If I found the perfect job, then…You could be missing the best years of your life. You could be missing the blessing that God has in store for you.


Dating Commandment II:
Thou shalt have the same values!
Find out and write down what would be your values.
Figure out what are your non-negotiables and what are your negotiables in a relationship.
Don’t let your non-negotiables be your negotiables!

Examples of values:
- Relationally intimate with God and other people
- Family oriented
- Spiritually mature
- Sexually pure
- Servanthood
- Financially mature
- Committed to growing
- Playtime (Fun !)
- Active in church

Find out also if the person that you like has good characters mentioned in Galatians 5: 22:
Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness and Self-control.

Test these characters in that person, observe how they relate and treat other people, observe if you can see these characters manifested in their life.

Don’t try to change a person later in the relationship! (either they have these characters or they don’t).


Dating Commandment III:
Thou shalt go deep to build a foundation!
(Relational Intimacy, not physical intimacy)

Communication! Communication! Communication!

Build a strong foundation in a relationship through communication.
Ask yourself these questions:
- What qualities draw you to this person?
- What is the level of sharing in this relationship?
- Do you feel safe? Can you be honest? Open? Able to be silly or serious? Able to be comfortable?
There are more to come and I will try to be a better learner and to take better notes to share with everybody.

(To be continued….)